Recognizing Childhood Anxiety: When Worry Becomes a Concern

Let’s be real: all kids worry. They worry about monsters under the bed, the spelling test on Friday, whether their pet goldfish misses them during school hours... typical stuff. But when worry takes the wheel and starts steering the day, that’s when we need to pause and look a little closer.

 

Childhood anxiety is more than just shyness or occasional nerves. It is the most common mental health concern among kids and teens, and it often wears a great disguise. Stomachaches, irritability, perfectionism, or even refusal to go to school can all be signs. Sneaky, right?

 

So how do you know when worry crosses the line from “totally normal” to “we should talk to someone?”

 

Signs That May Signal Childhood Anxiety

 

First, know this: anxiety does not look the same in every child. It can show up in lots of ways, but here are some of the most common signs:

 

·       Physical complaints like frequent headaches, tummy troubles, or fatigue with no medical explanation

·       Avoidance behaviors, such as refusing school, playdates, or new activities

·       Sleep struggles, including trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, or frequent nightmares

·       Irritability or big meltdowns when little things go wrong

·       Constantly needing reassurance and asking the same “what if” questions

·       Perfectionism and fear of making mistakes

 

It is not always dramatic. Sometimes the quietest kids are carrying the heaviest worry. They may not speak up, but their brains are working overtime.

 

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When to Seek Help

 

Here is the key question: is anxiety getting in the way? If your child’s worries are affecting school, friendships, home life, or their ability to just enjoy being a kid, it is time to reach out.

 

You do not need to wait for a crisis. Early support can make a big difference. Many kids improve quickly with the right tools and strategies.

Start by connecting with:

·       Your child’s pediatrician. They can rule out medical concerns and refer you to a mental health provider.

·       A licensed counselor or therapist who works with kids and uses Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) or similar approaches.

·       Your child’s school counselor. They can support your child during the day and help with resources.

 

What You Can Do at Home

 

You do not have to be a therapist to help your child manage anxiety. A few simple steps can go a long way:

 

·       Help them name what they are feeling. Saying it out loud makes it less scary.

·       Gently encourage them to face fears instead of avoiding them.

·       Teach calming strategies like deep breathing, stretching, or drawing.

·       Let them know their feelings make sense, even if you cannot fix the problem. Try saying, “That sounds tough. I am here with you.”

 

Final Word

 

An anxious child is not broken. In fact, kids with anxiety are often sensitive, thoughtful, and deeply caring. With the right support, they do not just get by — they grow. If your child seems stuck in a worry loop, trust your gut. You are not alone, and there is help available.

 

For more help with navigating parenting, please reach out to Family Guidance and Outreach.  FGO is a nonprofit agency in Lubbock that provides free parenting classes and school-based programs to help families build stronger, safer homes. Learn more at www.lubbockfamily.org.

 

  

Sources
American Academy of Pediatrics. (2021). Anxiety in Children. healthychildren.org
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC). (2023). Children’s Mental Health. cdc.gov
Child Mind Institute. (2022). Signs of Anxiety in Children. childmind.org